SUNDAY SERMON: The #1 reason people leave the church
By Rev. Stephen Baldwin
NT: Acts 1.1-11
Who watches Family Feud? It’s my favorite game show. The current host is Steve Harvey, who was born in Welch, McDowell County, West Virginia! His facial expressions alone make watching the show worthwhile!
Let’s play a little game of Family Feud today! Here’s how it works. I’ll ask a question, and whoever is willing to play has to guess an answer. 100 people are asked the same question. You get a point for as many people who give the same answer as you do.
We need two teams of 3-4 people. Who wants to play?
These are actual Family Feud religion questions. You can guess the top answers. Send me one player per team!
First question: What do men pray for when bowing their heads?
(Answers: family 23, women 17, Money 17, health 15, sports team 14, service to end 6, to be saved 3.)
Second question: Name something you hope doesn’t come out of you in church.
(Answers: gas/bathroom 53, cussin’ 19, burp 11, devil 4, laugh 3, snot/sneeze 2, vomit 2).
Third and final question, and this is a serious one–and the reason we’ve played this silly game to talk about something important: Why do people stop going to church?
(Answers: they stopped believing 32, not important to their life 22, politics/culture 16, hurt/scandals 15, conflict in local church 12, switched to new religion 3.)
Thank you, contestants! Please be seated. I hope you enjoyed the game. Sometimes we are good at guessing the reasons people think or act the way they do, and sometimes we aren’t.
It surprised me to read the Pew Research Center’s latest study on why people leave church. Far and away, the most common reason people leave the church they grew up in is that…they just stopped believing. Let me say that one more time: The #1 reason people stop being active in church is…that they just stop believing.
Folks are sounding the alarm bells over the study. They say it’s a sign of doom for the church. But I don’t see it that way at all. I think it’s an honest answer. Humans doubt. We waver in our belief. Just like Thomas and Moses and Abraham and Peter and Paul and Sarah and Gideon and John the Baptist and Jeremiah and Zechariah. They all had moments of doubt. I think it’s refreshing that folks are being honest about their moments of doubt, rather than blaming their decisions on something else that isn’t the real issue.
But the question remains: How do we respond when folks struggle with their belief? Today is Ascension Sunday in the church, when we read the story of Jesus ascending into Heaven. And I think it gives us some helpful advice. Ascension Sunday is a moment when the past and future converge in the present–the disciples’ past decision to follow Jesus into the Heavenly Kingdom one day in the future means that right now they are stuck in between, waiting and watching as they look to the sky.
We too are stuck in between. Between the stories of our faith in the past and a future we are promised to experience. We too are stuck in between who we have been and who God calls us to be. We too are stuck between living in the world and not being of the world. And being stuck is enough to test everyone’s belief.
If you haven’t had yours tested, thanks be to God. But get ready. Your day will come. Life tests our faith and belief in all kinds of ways. When that happens, don’t you want someone to be there for you?
Which is the answer to our question: How do we respond to people who stop believing and walk away? We stay in touch. We live the faith. We share the Gospel in action. We practice the Golden Rule. We continue the church traditions begun over 2,000 years ago after Jesus ascended and the disciples took up his mantle.
You see, the interesting thing about the Pew study is this: Guess what the #1 reason is that people stay in the faith they were raised in? Because they still believe.
That’s both the main reason for people who stay and for people who leave. Belief is a powerful thing. As individuals, we may fall in or fall out of belief at times. That’s OK. So long as the community of faith is there to support folks when they’ve fallen out. We all get caught, like those disciples, gazing at the clouds wondering if it can all be true. Remember what Jesus taught us: He is preparing a place for us now. He is the gate, between this world and the next. And he will return one day as quickly as he left.
Belief is a gift from God. We can’t earn it. We can’t achieve it. It’s a gift. Sometimes we get more, sometimes we get less.
Belief is also a gift we can give. The great coach Jim Valvano once said, “The greatest gift you can give your children is to believe in them.” Isn’t the same true of anyone in your life, whether it’s a co-worker or a family member or a church friend? The greatest gift you can give them is to believe in them. Root for them. Encourage them. Support them. Believe in them especially when they are struggling to believe. That will inspire others in ways you can’t even imagine. To put it plainly, when someone stops being part of the church because they stop believing, that’s precisely the time they need someone to believe in them. That’s exactly the time they need someone to show them that Jesus still believes in them.
The Pew survey speaks for itself. A lot of folks are struggling to believe. It’s something that we all face at one time or another. It is in those times especially when we need to be shown by people that they still believe in us. It’s a sign that God still believes in us too.
It might be something as simple as watching an episode of Family Feud together. Or sending someone a clip of Steve Harvey roasting a guest for giving the worst answer imaginable. Jesus believes in you; the greatest gift you can give him in return, to show that you believe in him, is to believe in his family. Amen.
